change what you're saying, not what you said
by tamzinrose
Summary: A prequel of sorts, for What I Am and What They're Making Me. A basketball game between the East High Wildcats and the McKinley High Titans, featuring Chad as a gay guru. Implied Chyan and implied future Puckurt.


The East High Wildcats have an openly gay guy on their team. His boyfriend's the mascot. He's a skinny blonde kid and he's fucking incredible, the way he moves. Everyone's staring at him. Puck finds it hard to look away, but he's not staring the same way everybody else is. It's fucking Lima. They're judging and jeering. It makes Puck feel sick.

Most of the guys on the team aren't happy about it. Some of the guys on the team are being pretty fucking vocal about how not happy they are to be playing against a gay guy. There was murmuring in the locker room before, but now it's louder. It's name calling. It's words Puck stopped saying once he joined glee, about the same time he stopped throwing Kurt Hummel in dumpsters.

The Wildcats' gay player, the guy with the hair and the blonde boyfriend with the hypnotic hips, does a good job at pretending he can't hear it, for a while. But then there are gestures, and more insults, and something to do with his boyfriend that Puck doesn't quite catch but figures is bad from the expression on his face and the way their team captain puts a restraining hand on his shoulder. It reminds Puck of himself and Finn.

By halftime, the guy's bristling. Puck doesn't know how far the guys from his team are gonna take this, but he's pretty sure it's already gone too far. This guy is gonna snap. Maybe that's the point. Puck is ashamed that these assholes are his teammates.

So he goes over. They're mostly sitting down and drinking water, distractedly watching their cheerleaders. They all look pissed. The gay guy, number 8, is pacing, his fists clenched. He's muttering under his breath but he stops when he sees Puck. Their team captain, number 14 and apparent Finn substitute, walks over warily.

"Hey. Listen, I'm sorry."

"Oh." Number 8 says, his shoulders slumping.

"I'm Troy." The team captain says, wearing a friendly earnest smile that also reminds Puck of the absent Finn. Puck doesn't know where he is, because they're still not talking and Finn's still mad.

"I'm Puck."

"I'm Chad, and my boyfriend's name is Ryan." He glances over at the cheerleaders, his boyfriend leading the routine, and he smiles. That smile makes Puck feel even worse about his fucking shitty teammates and fucking shitty Lima.

"He's good."

"He really is. He choreographs all of it too. He's incredible."

The mood feels more relaxed, but Puck still feels guilty. He can sense the way his team are watching him, glaring daggers. He doesn't want to go back over there. "I really am sorry. If there was anything I could do..."

Chad shakes his head quickly. "No, dude, I get it. It's not your fault."

"Are you gay too?" Troy asks.

"Dude! How many times? You can't say shit like that."

Puck just laughs. "I don't know. Maybe."

Chad gives him a critical look for a long moment, and then he nods. "Okay. Come with me."

They walk back to the locker room together. Puck doesn't care what anybody thinks about it, beyond Ryan, because he feels bad enough about all this shit as it is. Chad assures him Ryan won't mind that they're having a Talk. In Puck's head, it gets a capital letter to show how serious it is.

"There's a guy, right? He sings, he dances, he sparkles." Chad grins. "He makes you say _maybe_ and fraternise with the enemy. If he's anything like Ryan, he makes you sing and dance with him. I used to think musicals were gay and I called him a fairy and a princess and whatever, but the thing is... That shit goes away. When you realise, then you stop. For me, it was when we played baseball, and I saw that Ryan could sparkle _and_ play sports. I guess I'm just now realising how lucky I am, because my team had my back and my friends were on my side and I never once felt like I was on my own with everyone else against me. I'm really sorry Puck."

Puck's quiet for a moment, frowning. There's no easy way to respond to that, so he moves on and offers some advice of his own instead. "I think they want an excuse to hit you, so you have to not hit them first."

"I can do that." They stand up to leave, but Chad grabs Puck's shoulder and pulls him into a hug. "Be safe Puck."

The Wildcats end up winning. Puck ends up spitting mouthfuls of blood in the shower. All that aggression had to go somewhere. It turns out it doesn't matter whether he knows if he's gay or not, because the team's decided for him.


End file.
